Taexalia

wild.life

Quit Floating

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Boundaries - Take No Shit

I have not been giving my blog much attention recently and so I decided to resort to pulling a random SoulCollage card from my deck and free-writing from it (a handy trick that has worked in the past for this blogger).

When I pulled the card out I had a "oh no not that one - put it back quick!" reaction. As uncomfortable as it usually is, I find it is the signs, symbols and themes that I resist the most that lead to the best insights. I'm not really surprised to see the card because the theme of the card has been rolling around in my mind, and life, for the last wee while. It's not a stranger to this blog either as I've written about it in the past when talking about boundaries and emotional predators.

I've been thinking about my recent need for seclusion, my wish to somehow protect myself from what I call Other People's Stuff. I've been finding it challenging to let the "you are..." and the "you should..." and the generally judgemental comments go, and instead I've been allowing my rampant mind to turn them into much bigger events than they really are - a classic form of creative self-sabotage.

My tendency has been to take some space and sit with myself for a while, not disconnect but detach a little, if that makes sense. Do my own thing. Find my own rhythms again - moving house seemed to stretch into such a long and drawn out process and it seemed to take forever to deal with the additional chaos of sound-proofing the property.

I feel like I've lost some time somewhere between trying to tame the chaos inside and losing myself in my ever-challenging garden, which I suspect may never be tame. I feel like I've been in Limbo and Limbo has no boundaries.

Aha.

So that is where this is going.

It's not so much about being vigilant about how Other People's Stuff is encroaching my space, it's about how my boundaries have become liquid and a wee bit too fluid and if I'm floating around in Limbo then it's no wonder I'm finding myself bobbing in one direction and then another...

I'm drawn to the image in the background, the trellis that today speaks to me of patterns and consistency - with a little bit of imperfection and broken-ness too. As if the message is that it is time to focus on myself and my rhythms now that our home is feeling like a good living space... time to rise to the challenges of my creativity now that I have no excuses *wink*

I'm also drawn to the image of the tower which reminds me of the house in the card I made last June. It's inspiring to look back at that card knowing that I was at the very beginning of the process of getting the flat ready to sell, to know that when I made it I had no idea where we would end up, or when. To see the card speaking of Spring and that our move eventually happened the following Spring and to smile at the power of manifesting even when one is in a dark pit of anxiety and depression.

The rambling meander brings the message that setting boundaries and goals brings the changes one wants to see, sort of like a pat-on-the-back-I've-done-it - now what's next?

SoulCollage® is the process, developed by Seena B. Frost, of creating a deck of collaged cards from found images—cards that are arranged in suits for the primary purpose of self-exploration and self-acceptance. SoulCollage® cards are made from original purchased art (e.g., art published in magazines, calendars, books, cards, etc.) and personal materials (e.g., photos). SoulCollage cards are not to be sold, traded, or bartered and are to be reproduced only for the personal use of the maker of the card.